Five Reasons NOT to Flip Houses
Ok, let me start this blog by being very transparent. AP Real Estate is pro-flipping. Doesn't matter if it's houses, burgers or Aunt Jemima's Chocolate Chip Pancakes (no free ads). If it can be flipped, we will flip it. That being said, there are plenty of reasons NOT to flip houses. My goal with this blog is not to dissuade anyone from pursuing the luxurious lifestyle us house flippers lead, but rather to aptly prepare someone before taking the plunge into the wild world of real estate investing. So here are five reasons you may want to think twice about trying to do what we do.
1. Everybody Does It
Unfortunately, thanks to our future employer HGTV and the likes of Chip and Joanna and the Property Bros (total knock off of the AP Boys), people love to flip houses. Or at least people love to "talk" about flipping houses and "think" about flipping houses. The truth is, very few people who talk about flipping homes will ever do it. Nevertheless, there are more people today than there ever have been before trying their hand at real estate investing. What does this mean? It means more competition than ever before. Deals are hard to find, and it's tough to compete with the big dawgs on the block. Plus, the last thing you wanna be is a conformist. So do the AP Boys a favor and do yourself a favor... find a different hobby... Speaking of Chip and Joanna Gaines...
2. Your Gains Will Suffer
Sometimes I reminisce back to the days when I could almost bench two plates. Those days are long since gone, as more time spent flipping homes equals less time spent doing bench press in the squat rack. I know, I know... you're probably thinking to yourself, "He must be lying, Andrew can rep out 225 in his sleep!" Well let me assure you, I don't lie, and your gains will suffer immensely. It's almost like having a perpetual excuse to not go to the gym. Anytime I don't want to work out I just tell myself I'm too tired from working on the house. And guess what... it works every time.
3. Your Love Life Will Suffer
You probably read that last section thinking your front double bicep pose would be the only thing that suffered as a result of flipping homes. Well I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you can kiss your shot at love goodbye as well. It's no secret that I was an absolute stud growing up. My problem, like so many world-class athletes, was that I peaked too early. Ever since college I've been clinging on to whatever semblance of a love life that I had left. Well that has also been completely extinguished since I started flipping homes. Forget going out on dates, I don't even have time to talk to girls. Even if I did, I'm pretty sure I've all but forgotten how to at this point. But don't worry... I'm still holding out hope that one day, when I'm 35 years old with a failed business still living in my parents basement, that I'll meet future Mrs. Abbott. I hope she has a good job.
Live look at me anytime a girl makes eye contact
4. People Expect You to Know How to Fix Things
By far the most annoying thing about flipping houses is when people just assume you know how to do stuff. I was at a friend's the other day (ya I have friends) and his door wouldn't close for some reason. He looks over at me and says, "Hey can you take a look at this?" Are you kidding me...? Who do you think I am? Just cause I happen to flip houses you think I can magically make doors close. Like I'm some sort of door doctor. I can't even remember which way to screw in a lightbulb sometimes. Long story short that really set me off, and we're no longer friends.
5. Numbers and Spreadsheets
You know on those house flipping shows, when they throw some numbers up on the screen, and the annoying couple talks about their $5 million dollar budget after winning the lottery. What most people don't realize is that within that monstrously obscene budget, there is a LONG list of itemized receipts and expense tracking. Somehow Brendan boondoggled his way into being the content guy for AP Real Estate, and I got left with the accounting. Am I bitter? No, because frankly I don't trust him when it comes to numbers. But there is an incredible amount of time and effort that goes into analyzing deals, creating your budget and tracking your expenses. So fair warning... if you're not a "numbers and spreadsheets" kind of guy (or girl...sup?), flipping may not be for you.
So there you go. I hope I've properly prepared you for some of the less glamorous aspects of house flipping. If you are brave enough to assume these risks, I wish you the best of luck. This life is not for everyone.